IM is for International Messaging
by Obasa Reisan
Summary: Nine friends from nine countries face high school in modern-day America. Will their problems band them together or force them apart? "Only their instant messages reveal the full story..." Full summary inside. High school AU


**A/N: Ah, my first (published) fanfiction! Thanks so much for choosing to read this! I'm really excited and my fingers are shaking as I type this! XD I kept noticing all these fanfictions of characters writing letters and characters making diary entrees, and I thought, "Hey, what if everyone KNEW what Alfred and Arthur texted to each other...during high school..." and it led to this fic!**

**Full summary: Being a freshman in a new high school stinks, but it's slightly more bearable when you know your buddies are right by your side. However, high school will prove to have some unexpected (and really rather annoying) surprises in store for them! How will they cope with these changes, and will they stay together? Only their instant messages reveal the full story... LOTS OF PAIRINGS (later on)!**

**Characters in the story: Feliciano (Italy), Kiku (Japan), Alfred (USA), Arthur (UK), Francis (France), Ivan (Russia), Yao (China), Toris (Lithuania) and Feliks (Poland). This fanfiction is the instant messages and text messages of these nine students. Everyone else is only mentioned.**

**(Inspired by the novels TTYL and TTFN!)**

_**Some things to note: This fanfiction consists of a series of instant messages from each character to the other. Keeping that in mind, any spelling or grammar error is probably ON PURPOSE. If you don't like that sort of thing, well...this story will annoy you severely.**** I just want to make it as close to real-life texting/IM dialogue as I can.**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia: Axis Powers. Neither do I own TTYL or TTFN. (Oh, and I don't own Alice in Wonderland or Black Ops, either! ^_^) Everything belongs to it's respective owners.**

**Enjoy! (Sorry for the long author's note...)**

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_Sunday, September 23, 3:57 p.m._

hamburgerhero101: dude! sup?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: aargh. didn't we finish speaking only about 10 minutes ago?

hamburgerhero101: yeah, but dude, i miss u. don't tell me ur tired of me alredy?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: there are only a certain number of times a day any human being can stand to be around you.

hamburgerhero101: :( dude, that's cold.

hamburgerhero101: hey, member that guy at wackenburger who stuffed a monster mackerel with cheese whole into his mouth? That was sick.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: god, don't remind me of that. it was horrifying.

hamburgerhero101: dudes got guts. this had cheese, I tell u! cheese! three layers of driping meet and burbly cheesy tastyness!

hamburgerhero101: u think I could do that? I wanna try that.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: only you would find something so disgusting to be fascinating.

hamburgerhero101: no way. the dudes friends were cheering him on. member?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: im sorry but I am not supporting your decision to choke on a hunk of cow. Simple as that.

hamburgerhero101: daw, wat a good friend u are, artie. But ur so unsupportive. I can c it now: dude walks in with a wining smile, picks up the god of all burgers, and, with one hand, shoves the whole thing in. dudes still smiling but then the burger is lodged in his throat. He struggles 2 scream 4 help, and wat is his best friend doing? sitting at another table laughing at him. :[

InvincibleBritishTeacup: now that's not true. id sit at the same table to get a closer look.

hamburgerhero101: I take back wat I said. Ur a horrible friend. :(

InvincibleBritishTeacup: then stop IMing me and let me write my damn English report!

hamburgerhero101: y r u riting that shit? Mr. greens crazy, and wat happened to our boycott?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: you mean YOUR boycott. And my parents arent like yours Alfred. They're not willing to sit by while their son gorges himself on processed meats and let his grades drop through the floor. My parents will flog me alive if I don't do this work, and you know it.

hamburgerhero101: ah, british parents. "wot? Ur assignment isn't done, u godawful wanker? Get in the lift, u bloody fool, and we'll discuss ur punishment over tea." I luve ur mom and dad.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: they do not talk like that.

hamburgerhero101: yeah but they do drink tea when they give u punishments.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: because it calms them down.

hamburgerhero101: u think I can get mom to let me eat a burger before I get punished?

hamburgerhero101: aw shit. Moms yellin at me. I gotta run.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: good riddance.

hamburgerhero101: bye to u 2!

* * *

_Monday, September 24, 5:23 p.m._

hamburgerhero101: yo, kiku. talk about a performance, my man. ;)

SeasonalRain: Oh, hello, Alfred-san. Yes…I suppose I did get carried away…

hamburgerhero101: think nothing of it, bro. u were awesome. im so proud.

SeasonalRain: It's nothing, Alfred-san. I worked hard to earn that money. That man had no right to take it from me.

hamburgerhero101: but dude, its so unlike u, 2 c u running after some stranger yellin. All the people who were walking around there like backed up as soon as you got close. and then u tackled the dude!

SeasonalRain: It was not on purpose! I tripped over something…

hamburgerhero101: wat a heroic move, dude. I was totally gunna chase after him with u, but then I thot "nuh-uh. let me give kiku his moment to shine. dudes earned it."

SeasonalRain: Well, I appreciate that, Alfred-san, but I was just trying to get back what I earned. I was not trying to be a hero.

hamburgerhero101: it was awesome that u caught him, 2. I didnt know u could run so fast. that guy was a whole foot taller than u, 2!

hamburgerhero101: although pretty much everyones a foot taller than u, but whatevs. U still rocked!

SeasonalRain: Alfred-san, there is really no need to make such a big deal of it…

SeasonalRain: By the way, what is it you wanted to go to the mall for? I don't recall you buying anything.

hamburgerhero101: dude, u don't have 2 always buy crap wen u go 2 the mall. I just had to get away from matt *shudder* hes been breathing down my throat since school started, man!

SeasonalRain: Well, no doubt starting high school is a frightening experience.

hamburgerhero101: yeah but the dudes a total whimp. He follows me all over everywhere, like even to my classes sometimes, which nobody ever says anything cuz they dont even notice hes there. And then sometimes he even grabs my shirt, and when I yell at him to quit it hes all "b-but if im alone no one will see me!" and he looks real freaked out like hes gonna disappear. Like some horror movie or shit like that.

hamburgerhero101: dude has serious issues.

SeasonalRain: I think you are lucky, Alfred-san. To have a younger sibling to watch over and teach sounds very rewarding.

hamburgerhero101: but he's not even my LITTLE brother. He's the exact same fricken age as me, which makes it all the more pathetic. but u can totally have him if you want.

hamburgerhero101: he still even sleeps with a teddy bear at night, man!

SeasonalRain: There is nothing wrong with that. I sometimes cannot sleep without my Pikachu stuffed animal next to me. And don't you sleep with a stuffed alien?

hamburgerhero101: first of all, pikachu has his own awesome tv show. He cant be compared. Plus kiku, ur Japanese, and so girly sometimes it hardly matters. As for tony, hes not a stuffed animal, hes my fricken GUARDIAN. theres a ghost who sits in the bathroom pipes across the hall, making this creepy-ass noise all night, and I just know if I didnt have tony that THING would come and rite on my room wall with blood.

hamburgerhero101: tony is no stuffed polar bear, kiku.

SeasonalRain: Is there something about me being Japanese that makes me different from you?

hamburgerhero101: no, dude, not really, but I mean, u can sleep with stuffed animals BECUZ ur Japanese. I mean, like, its okay for Japanese people to look girly sometimes. They can totally be whimpy and it works for them. Same as Canadians. Americans, though, have certain standards. We gotta look tuff all the time.

SeasonalRain: -_-

SeasonalRain: Alfred-san, it is not a good idea to insult a person with a black belt in karate.

hamburgerhero101: but dude, u can only use it for self-defense. And u wouldnt hurt me anyways.

SeasonalRain: Perhaps I wouldn't, but you need to learn to be careful with what you say to people. One day you will say or do the wrong thing to the wrong person, and you will end up badly hurt. I know you don't say stupid things on purpose, so I ignore it, but you might wander into someone who will not take it so lightly.

hambugerhero101: hey! I dont say stupid stuff! :(

hamburgerhero101: and u sound like a yoda fortune cookie right now dude. Its bumming me out.

SeasonalRain: -_-; I need to go anyway, Alfred-san. I still have not finished my English paper. I hope you will excuse me.

hamburgerhero101: aw, not u 2, dude! First matt, then artie, and now u! were supposed to be boycotting mr. green cuz he gives too much freakin crap! How long have u been working on it anyway, like a month?

SeasonalRain: The rubric has very…specific directions…and I did not agree to boycotting Green-sensei, Alfred-san. Although I do agree his workload can be somewhat tiring, I do not wish to cause an uproar.

hamburgerhero101: :( what happened to the superflyingtackle kiku I know and love?

hamburgerhero101: but fine, I can take a hint, man. all u nerds r really bugging me! :(

* * *

_Monday, September 24, 5:31 p.m._

VitalRosePetals: bonjour, mon ami!

InvincibleBritishTeacup: hm. hey francis.

VitalRosePetals: do you know what time it is, mon ami?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: time to call the police and let them know I'm being harassed?

VitalRosePetals: you jest. dry british humor as always. no, it is that time of the year when the trees sigh and their rich green hue turns to the bright reds and yellows and dance down to the earth. it is a time were the summer heat still lingers but a tiny wisp of winter begins to tinge the air. breathe deep, my friend, for the crisp scent of autumn has arrived! *romantic sigh*

InvincibleBrisitshTeacup: hah, yay. very poetic. excuse me while I vomit.

VitalRosePetals: not everyone can capture the essence of autumn so perfectly, you know. it truly is a beautiful season.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: not to bring you off your high, but you know you say the same thing about every season.

VitalRosePetals: that is because every season is beautiful, mon ami. And you live to bring people down from happiness.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: hm. true.

VitalRosePetals: *shakes head exasperatedly* if only I was talking to that little friend of yours, the quiet one. he would understand.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: who, kiku? I guess so. he's pretty deep.

VitalRosePetals: indeed, I should be having this conversation with someone with years of knowledge, instead of you, this simple-minded amoeba.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: hes not that much older than us you know.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: you can spell the word amoeba? impressive.

VitalRosePetals: you must never doubt the inaccuracy of a French-English dictionary. And yes, have you forgotten I am smarter than the average joe, as the americans say?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: eh, whatever. so why are you iming instead of calling? you usually call.

VitalRosePetals: I did call, but alas, you did not answer. I was beginning to feel rejected *wipes tear away with handkerchief*

InvincibleBritishTeacup: you called? Ah, my ringer's off. And all rejects feel rejected. don't you know that?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: if I put that saying on a t-shirt, do you think it would sell?

VitalRosePetals: I would not buy it. It is horribly corny.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: youre one to talk. Youre the optimum icon of corniness. I could pour milk on you and eat you for breakfast, that's how corny you are*****

VitalRosePetals: oh, what a dirty statement. You wish to eat me up? That can certainly be arranged. *licks lips*

InvincibleBritishTeacup: youre revolting, you stupid dyke.

VitalRosePetals: I can assure you though, what youll be eating up wont be milk~~

VitalRosePetals: arthur? Are you still there?

VitalRosePetals: log off now, mon ami, but you can't escape me at school! You are going to have to make good on your promise to me sooner or later *evil laugh*

* * *

_Tuesday, September 25, 6:23 a.m._

**_*TEXT MESSAGING*_**

pastamama5: kikuuuuuuuu are you there?

SeasonalRain: Feliciano-san? You are awake very early. Is everything alright?

pastamama5: big brother lovino and I had a fight yesterday. He threw a lamp at my head :(

SeasonalRain: He threw a…lamp…at you…?

pastamama5: yeah and my head HUUUUUUURTS. Im not going to school today

SeasonalRain: Oh, I am so sorry to hear that, Feliciano-san. I will be sure to bring home any assignments you might have missed.

pastamama5: thanks but you don't have to…actually I was wondering…could you stay home too…?

SeasonalRain: What? I can't do that.

pastamama5: yeah you can! call in sick! that's what feliks does all the time, and so does lovino and Antonio and francis…

pastamama5: I don't wanna be all by myself :(

SeasonalRain: I'm sorry Feliciano-san but…I cannot miss school. If I am to make the highest Honor Roll then I cannot miss any days of school at all. And my parents are expecting me to do very well.

pastamama5: but KIKUUUUUU…

SeasonalRain: How about this? After school I can come over to your place. I will bring some ramen, if you like.

pastamama5: …really…?

SeasonalRain: Certainly. What I find interesting, though, is that you are asking me to stay home and not Ludwig-san.

pastamama5: heh. If I asked ludwig to stay home from school, he would KILL me…I don't want to die…

SeasonalRain: That has never stopped you before.

pastamama5: uve never seen Ludwig on the first couple weeks of school. Its scary~!

pastamama5: so ur going to go to school then…? but u promise to come over today…?

SeasonalRain: Yes. I promise.

pastamama5: yaaaaaay! I can't wait~!

SeasonalRain: ^_^

* * *

_Tuesday, September 25, 6:46 p.m._

InvincibleBritishTeacup: hey yao. Its been awhile.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Ah, indeed it has. How have you been?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: ive been better. Francis was being francis, and Alfred was being a dick. As usual.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Interesting way to start a conversation…it's also interesting that these two are your best friends. People are not supposed to hate their best friends, as far as I know.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: I know. God help me. But at least I have a few friends who keep me sane. Like you and kiku.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: That's not true. We're all insane here.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: sounds suspiciously like alice in wonderland.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Ah, yeah. I've been trying to read that book, but everything just doesn't fit together…it's too odd for me. I heard that it was supposed to represent what a person sees while they are drunk, or high.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Westerners see strange things when they are on drugs…

InvincibleBritishTeacup: huh. don't I know it. But the weird thing is, even though its all so random, it still makes sense, doesn't it? like puzzle pieces that don't look like they belong to anything in particular, but then together, it all fits. that's what being high is like.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: …I am almost afraid to ask…

InvincibleBritishTeacup: hey, don't knock it till uve tried it.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Do you talk about drugs with your other friends…?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: ure the one who brought up alice in wonderland. and getting high.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Yes but I didn't

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Nevermind.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: lets just change the subject. What are you doing for your birthday? that's soon, right?

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Ah, yes it is! I will be celebrating it with my entire family-those who live in the United States, that is. They are flying in from all over California to be here. On my official birthday I'll be spending it with my family, and so will my Lunar birthday. Later I'll have one with all of you guys. Everyone's so happy for me, it's nice.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: I'll say. Your ENTIRE family is coming, regardless of where in California they live?

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Well, it is my first birthday since my family came to America. And turning 17 is indeed a big deal in the U.S., right?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: sure. i think it is.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: wait, it has been a year since you came, hasn't it? you picked up English very fast.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: I'm good with languages. ^_^ Besides, in China children are required to learn English in school.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: I've been able to speak English fluently since I was…about 11?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: seriously?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: pfft. didn't know that.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Aren't you learning Japanese now yourself?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: only because I'm applying to a high school that requires you to speak both. The school's in japan.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: You…want to go to a school in Japan?

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Does Alfred know?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: uh, not exactly... but there's no need to tell him yet. I havent even sent in the application.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: He will throw a fit if you don't tell him. I actually hope you don't go. So many people would miss you.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: yeah, right. If there's one thing you guys need less of around here, its sarcasm and bad cooking.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: besides, you just said you hate alice in wonderland. a british work, thank you very much.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: I didn't say that! …I just find the writings of Confucius a little easier to understand…

InvincibleBritishTeacup: well, whatever. We'll just see how things go.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: oh, wait! Is there anything you want for your birthday?

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Oh, I wasn't expecting you to ask! Don't worry about it, Arthur. You don't have to get me anything.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Well…now that you mention it…

Crimson_Gold_Panda: There was this Hello Kitty bento box set I saw once at Target…

InvincibleBritishTeacup: really? Is that all you can think of? A hello kitty lunch box set?

Crimson_Gold_Panda: You don't understand! It was really cute! Baba tells me I have too many Hello Kitty things…and she says my bento box works just fine… BUT. I really…really want it…

InvincibleBritishTeacup: well…

Crimson_Gold_Panda: There's even a little charm of her head on the chopsticks! It's really really cute! ^/^

InvincibleBritishTeacup: aaah. Fine. Since your folks wont get it for you.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: Thank you so much, Arthur! ^_^

InvincibleBritishTeacup: oh. Hold on a moment, yao. Alfred's shown up on my buddy list. I'm going to see what he wants.

Crimson_Gold_Panda: I should probably be going anyway. It's my turn to make dinner tonight. See you later. It was great talking again!

* * *

_Tuesday, September 25, 6:51 p.m._

InvincibleBritishTeacup: Alfred?

hamburgerhero101: lemme copy your project. PLEEZE?

InvincibleBritishTeacup: what? no!

hamburgerhero101: come on, pleeze! I don't have anything! Mr. greens gonna kill me, man! Its due 2morrow!

InvincibleBritishTeacup: your problem now. Your boycott backfiring, eh?

hamburgerhero101: mom says if I fail this project shes going to stop giving me allowence for like, ever!

hamburgerhero101: I need to by the new black ops! and I dont have any money!

InvincibleBritishTeacup: no way. Its too much fun watching you squirm.

hamburgerhero101: PLEEZE! I'll be indebited to you forever! Come on, man!

InvincibleBritishTeacup: …I must be some kind of idiot…

hamburgerhero101: THANK U, BRO! ur like, awesome.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: ill email it to you. Just be sure to rewrite a couple of paragraphs and change my name so you don't get caught like last time!

hamburgerhero101: no problem bro. I got this. u rule, dude ;)

InvincibleBritishTeacup: I will not be swayed by your petty words of praise.

InvincibleBritishTeacup: but you REALLY owe me. There's no way im letting you get away with this!

hamburgerhero101: yeah yeah. :)

* * *

_Wednesday, September 26, 4:15 p.m._

fabulousmnie: liet! I AM BEING STALKED.

Liet_T: good to hear from you too. start with a hello next time, okay?

fabulousmnie: ur so totally mean, liet! Y r u so unsupportive in my greatest hour of need?

Liet_T: im sorry…I just had a bad day, that's all.

fabulousmnie: ill bet u had a bad day! I havent seen u, like, AT ALL since school started! didn't the retards in the office KNOW I need to be with u in like, at least 1 class! But no, we don't even get the same effing lunch period!

fabulousmnie: great. Im sad now. As if my horrible stalker wasn't totally enough of a dampers. Thanks a lot liet. T_T

Liet_T: im sorry, feliks…don't be upset. We can hang out sometime this week, I know we will.

Liet_T: so whos stalking you?

fabulousmnie: well, I didn't actually _C_ the stalker, liet. A truly amazing stalker is never seen or heard by anyone, especially that who is being stalked. Duh

Liet_T: then how do you know you were being stalked?

fabulousmnie: becuz of their fatal error: going through my makeup bag.

fabulousmnie: I KNW everything in that bag. I alphabetize my eyeliners by designer, lipsticks by color, and never, EVER do I mix up my powders by using the same powder fluff thingie, whatever u call them. And worse; it was OPEN.

fabulousmnie: I NEVER leave that bag open! EVER!

Liet_T: you never even part with that bag. Why was it away from you in the first place?

fabulousmnie: shit happens. TT_TT

fabulousmnie: and my favorite lip gloss is missing! IM GONNA BEAT UP SOME BITCHES, LIET.

Liet_T: any idea on who it could be?

fabulousmnie: no, not unless its ivan, being a total dickwad. But it could be someone whos pissed at my awesome fashion skills. IM A MAN AND I WEAR A SKIRT, GET THE FUCK OVER IT *flashes*

Liet_T: I'll buy you some new lipgloss ^_^

fabulousmnie: y r u laffing at me? That lipgloss was irreplaceable! I got it at polska, and im like never going back there again while im young and like, alive

Liet_T: polska's not going anywhere, feliks.

fabulousmnie: but my lipgloss is…further and further away… *reaches at nothing*

fabulousmnie: my moms mad at me 2. She says this wouldn't happen if I did things "normal" *rolls eyes*

Liet_T: no one heres really normal.

fabulousmnie: don't even go there, liet. Ur like the normallest person I noe.

Liet_T: …how's that?

fabulousmnie: ur, like, a good kid. Ur nice to people, sumtimes 2 nice and I wanna strangle u. u get along with almost every1 u meet. Ur always reading all the time. Ur skared of ivan. Every1 is skared of him. I think hes fat and needs a new hairdo, and he like, needs to ditch the scarf, but that's about it. Im the freaky drag no one likes. *sulks in corner*

Liet_T: your not a freak, feliks. You know youre the most unique person anyones ever met. Youre just so unafraid of being yourself that theyre unprepared for it. that's all.

Liet_T: and I like you. If that helps.

fabulousmnie: um, it sorta does. Thanks

Liet_T: and I am not scared of ivan. I am terrified of him.

fabulousmnie: hah! Member that time u hid in sum1's locker in sixth grade to hide from him? And u got locked in there, and there was sum kind of fungus stuff on the door and u got sick? XD u had a rash that like, nothing would cure. And nobody knew wat the hell it was? U know, liet? I totally figured it out!

Liet_T: you did?

fabulousness: It was FEAR. U turned fear into a disease, liet! Nothing cures fear! *mwahaha*

Liet_T: Youre something else, feliks. ^_^

Liet_T: wow, that might have been the worst week of my life…

fabulousmnie: no it wasn't. cuz I was there. ;)

Liet_T: yeah, that's true. Youre right. :)

fabulousmnie: dammit liet. My idiot mamas calling me. Sumthing about cooking. Like, "if ur gonna act like a woman u gotta improve ur domestic skills!"

Liet_T: she should know by now you'll just burn all the food.

fabulousmnie: I noe rite! that's what I told her! ;)

* * *

**A/N: Grrr Alfred why is it so hard to write like you? DX**

**There were times writing this where it was hard to get into some of the characters... I don't know if it's noticeable, but sometimes I can't help feel like it is. Regardless, this was fun to write. I hate using so many likes and totallys for Feliks, but his was the easiest to do. ^_^**

**I hope you guys figured out who was who~! I don't think I made it all that difficult. ^_^**

**Please review! I would love to know what my readers thought of this first chaper, or if I ought to continue at all. Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated, but no flames, please. I catch fire too easily. XD**

*** I am so sorry about that cornflake joke. It was so cheesy. T_T**


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